Coffee Pot Lota: Breaking The Silence

by HijabMan :: posted 19 May 07

I’ve had so many serious, throught-provoking posts lately that I’ve decided to switch it up. I’ve decided to break the silence on one of the nuttiest things about the South-Asian Muslim Community in America.

First, a definition. A lota is a vessel used to carry and pour water. In common usage among South-Asian Muslims in America, the lota refers to a vessel with a spout that is used as a method for “maintaining personal hygiene after defecation.” (Wikipedia)

As someone who travels throughout the United States and Canada for Muslim conventions, I’m often lounging around the nearby hotels looking for a place to sleep or shower. Often times, while on these adventures, I come across the most disturbing sights of my life: The coffee pot (a complimentary service of most hotels) was next to the hotel-room toilet— an obvious sign that someone is using it to wash their bums after they do the deed.

You may think that this is an isolated practice, that maybe just a few children do it, but you would be wrong. First, all I had to do was ask five people on my buddy list if they had a photo of a coffee pot next to a toilet. Within mere seconds, I had one.

Also, A few months ago I was in a hotel room with a veryFamousMuslimCelebrity (FMC). After he used the bathroom to make ablutions for prayer, I walked in to make my ablutions and found the same scene, the coffee pot next to the toilet.

I stifled a laugh, and walked out, trying not to think about it as we got ready for prayer. To my surprise he had taken the pillow cases off the pillows to use for prayer rugs. Without my asking, he offered this explanation.

“A friend gave me the idea to use pillowcases instead of towels, HijabMan. You know, because you dont know where those towels have been…”

“Dear God,” I thought, “The man puts a coffee pot up to his bum, and then has the audacity to explain that he doesnt use towels to pray on, because ‘you dont know where they have been?’”

I don’t know how I kept from laughing, but I did. But because I didn’t laugh, for fear of embarassing this man, I couldn’t concentrate on my prayer— I was too busy trying not to think of the hilarity of what I had just witnessed. I was too busy with scenarios of an Arab or White, or African American couple about to make coffee one day in their hotel, and stopping to say “you don’t know where that has been,” and wondering if they imagined it next to the arse of a South Asian man.

This post is a public service announcement. Please do not use the coffee pot in hotel rooms as a method for cleaning your behind. In addition, do not drink anything from a coffee pot in a hotel room, as chances are it has already been soiled.

ps. Now here’s a man who would never use a coffee pot lota.

Related link (Thanks Shahnaz!): Lota installation (and stories) at the Queen Museum.

Update: Don’t use the glasses either, Saliha uses those. See the comments. Saliha, we all appreciate your honesty.

Marya at 19 May 07 :: #

lmao

I’ve never thought of using the lota, I usually grab a cup. But come to think of it, greater aim would be much appreciated!

Hijabman, you’re my hero :)
Usma at 19 May 07 :: #

LOL its funny cuz before this whole “bidet” toilet business started, people thought it was gross how Muslims used lota’s to clean themselves, but now its so popular to buy ‘bidet’ toilets which essentially do the same thing with water shooting up ‘there’!
Great article hijabman :)
The Jolly Bengali at 19 May 07 :: #

Speaking of bidets, I’m amazed at how common they are in Argentina. They’re in most households and hotel/hostel bathrooms. I have yet to use one… I’ve been using a plastic water bottle as a lota in my host family’s house. I keep it in my room so I don’t have to explain why I keep a water bottle next to the toilet…

Ewww. I’m gonna make sure to never use a coffee pot when I go to a hotel. Chances are that some Moslem used it to clean their behind…
sabrina at 19 May 07 :: #

oh my GOD! I was laughing hysterically. But why would anyone want to use a coffee pot as a “lota”! I couldn’t have imagined that, or I seriously lack imagination!
LondonMuslim at 19 May 07 :: #

I’ve never seen a case of coffeepot-lota before :S wow … that’s surprisingly thought-provoking!

I’ve learned 2 things today HijabMan =)

-Take my own travel prayer mat
-Don’t drink tea in hotel rooms
Shahnaz at 20 May 07 :: #

Did you know about the lota installation at the Queen Museum?

http://www.colorlines.com/article.php?ID=42&limit=0&limit2=750&page=1.

Sadia Rehman, the artist behind the installation is doing a second call for stories.
HijabMan at 20 May 07 :: #

Marya: My aim is perfect. Will you by my hero too? :-P

Usma: I have a sprayer now. I power spray my bum like a real man. grunts

Bengali: Its true, Amreekans seem to be one of the few places where watering the bum isnt standard.

Sabrina: If you’d like I can tell you about all the fascinating ways of the lota!

LondonMuslim: Glad I could be of help to you and oink.

Shahnaz: I didn’t, i’ll definitely link it. thanks
Radiant Light at 20 May 07 :: #

Salaam;
Eek what a thought!
You should maybe start advertising these.

(http://www.wudumate.co.uk/) (Internet Explorer only)
Me.xXx. at 20 May 07 :: #

oh lord that is nasty.
. at 20 May 07 :: #

i’m inspired to visit that installation and stop drinking coffee.
my new roomies always ask “why do you have a watering can in the bathroom…i didn’t see any plants.”
HijabMan at 20 May 07 :: #

:-)

Deebs: try the covert water bottle lota.
Marya at 20 May 07 :: #

I’ll be your hero, you’ll be my hero and we can have lil hero babies lol I know, StakhfurAllah, I’m terrible :)
UmmFarouq at 21 May 07 :: #

Laughed out loud, so much so that the kiddies came running to see what made mama smile.

I could think of a nasty play on words right now but I’m going to abstain, and be the better for it.
saliha at 21 May 07 :: #

hahahaha i thought my mom’s crazy friend was the only one who did that. i always use the glasses they leave in the bathrooms for water as lotas…dunno if that’s any better tho..
The Jolly Bengali at 22 May 07 :: #

HijabMan, your post inspired me to write my own about lotas. You’re such an inspiration!

http://www.lungis.com/wordpress/2007/05/22/mi-lota-argentina/
noor at 22 May 07 :: #

that was disgustingly hilarious…
Aliana at 31 May 07 :: #

You know its about time that someone should invent a foldable portable lota.

Welcome! This site serves two main purposes: to entertain and educate the Believing and curious community, and to generate a bit of cash—God willing. But there’s a lot more about HijabMan.

Coffee Pot Lota: Breaking The Silence

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